Feet Back On the Ground

Radio blasted. Miles driven. Pull into home. At least the thing that feels most like home anymore. The only consistent place in the past few years. There is a sense of stability, familiarity, security, and most of all reassurance. Something in life that seems together. Something that does not make you feel powerless in the world. That is the feelings that cross my mind as I enter the gates. I leave the rest of the world behind. Try and return to the person I was when I was here.

If I can just focus on this maybe everything spiraling out of control will somehow fall into place. Get just one thing right and I will feel like who I am supposed to be. Something I know I will not fail at. Something to bring me back to reality. If only it was really true things could remain the same. Friends change, feelings change, dynamics change. This all leaves a question in the mind. Will that affect your success? Will you be able to control the emotions? Can you push certain questions to back to your mind? Can you forget all the outside world problems? Will it all really come together? Are you any better off? Can you turn off your mind just a minute? How do you accept the differences and embrace the goodness coming out of it? Just breath. Let the anxieties cease. People put their faith into you for a reason everything else does not really matter. Those thoughts are not the reasons for being here or have anything to do with the situations at hand.

One step at a time. Realize your feet are back on the ground. They may have hit it running but they can touch and feel it. This is one place you do know what you are doing. This is one place you can keep it together. One place free to be whoever you want to be. Enjoy it while it lasts. Prove to yourself you still can be you. Blast the radio. Drive the miles. Come home. Remember this is your family. They make you smile, laugh, cry, scream, jump, and work you harder than anything you have ever experienced. That is what it is all about. Turn the mind off and get to work.